jueves, 26 de julio de 2007

SKRUTER Nº3: LOS 10 PROPOSITOS QUE MAS HACEMOS AL TERMINAR EL VERANO

Ayyys se acabó el veranito, por lo menos por Galicia, donde ya los aires fríos no permiten ni estar en la playita hasta que anochece ni el rocío de la noche te deja tomar cervezas en las terracillas. Es el momento de hacer borrón y cuenta nueva y hacer propósitos para la nueva temporada. Ahí van los diez más escuchados, en orden ascendente:

10) ESTUDIAR IDIOMAS

Porque: Porque aunque Puri sea peluquera y aunque Manu sea instalador de antenas cuando escuchan la radio les dicen que el futuro esta ahí fuera como si estuvieran en expediente X y que no serán nada en la vida si no saben inglés, francés, alemán y ahora tambien chino. “Ceac te ayudara a construirte un futuro sólido profesional”.
Que hacemos: Vamos a una academia de idiomas que llevamos viendo años dos manzanas más abajo de casa y preguntamos cuanto vale . Nos dicen que pagamos de inicio 950 € de matricula, y entonces preguntamos si nos dan algo por dejarlo a mitad de curso si nos cansamos.
Resultado: Nos dan la enhorabuena porque la gente lo deja a los dos meses de media.

9) CREAR UN FONDO PARA VACACIONES

Porque : Porque la mujer de Agustín se tuvo que quedar en Segovia por tercer verano consecutivo por culpa de que su marido y ella no administraron la pasta.
Que hacemos: La mujer de Agustín repasa los tickets del año y le pregunta si realmente fue necesario hacerse socio del equipo de futbol , comprarse la moto y tomar tantas cervezas por ahi con los amigos , y que podía privarse de cosas así para viajar.
Resultado: Agustín le pregunta a su mujer: Oye, ¿Viste el acueducto?

8)ESCRIBIR UN DIARIO
Porque: Para inmortalizar cada día y saber que sentimientos rondaban la cabeza en un momento determinado.
Que hacemos :Escribimos el primer dia un montón de cosas, vamos, incluyendo presentación, situación laboral, sentimental.....
Resultado: A primeros de noviembre esa libreta con una hoja escrita es para anotar la lista de la compra. Luego valdrá para hacer la porra de Eurovisión.

7) VER MENOS TELEVISION

Porque: Porque Luis en su trabajo le escucho a gente cultureta que no ve la tele nada, pero vamos, nada nada, y que leyeron libros que solo le suenan las tapas.
Que hacemos: Pues Luis llega a casa con “la sombra del viento”en la mano y le dice a su mujer que esta viendo salsa rosa que se va para cama que “ el no ve esas cosas, je je”
Resultado: La mujer de Luis se va a dormir una horilla después y se acuesta no sin antes apagar la tele de la habitación que estaba, opps, en telecinco!!

6)COLECCIONAR ALGO

Porque : Porque los estrategas del marketing han coincidido en lanzar su ataque mediatico avanzado septiembre para que piques y te compres los fascículos de “maquetas de aviones de la segunda guerra mundial”
Que hacemos: Josefa llega a casa con una sonrisa de oreja a oreja y le dice a su marido después de taparle los ojos : Tachannnnn! Mira lo que te traje
Resultado: El marido de Josefa decide comprar unos 8 fascículos más porque sino no puede terminar el avión, lo malo es que el cuarto no lo pudo conseguir y ahora la alfombra del salon tiene una mancha de lottite que no sale.

5)GASTAR MENOS TELEFONO

Porque: Porque entre el fijo y el móvil el teléfono se esta convirtiendo en uno de los mayores liquidadores del presupuesto familiar
Que hacemos: Intentamos acordarnos de todo lo que tenemos que decir antes de llamar, procuramos mandar sms y damos más perdidas.
Resultado: Agustín llama a Luis y le pregunta: Oye , viste la perdida que te envié?,
Luis le contesta: Sí, ya le mande otra a Rafa para que me llame preguntándome que quería y le diga que te llame a ver que querías tu.




4) ESTAR MÁS CON LA PAREJA

Porque : Pues porque en veranito las fiestillas tiran mucho, y a veces tenemos a la pareja un poquito olvidadilla y descuidada.
Que hacemos: Roberto llega a casa y le dice a su esposa: “Cariño, he decidido no currar tanto por la noche para poder estar más tiempo contigo”
Resultado: La esposa piensa: “y ahora cuando me voy a follar a Alfonso?”

3)DEJAR DE FUMAR
Porque: Porque hay un grupo de gente que nunca se les vio la cara pero que existen, que se llaman las autoridades sanitarias, que dicen que mata, reduce el esperma y más.
Que hacemos: No fumamos más, a no ser que nos pidamos una copa y pidamos tabaco
Resultado: Pasamos de comprar tabaco a pedirlo, y luego compramos cuando todo el mundo te ve con cara de sabandija apaleadora.

2)HACER DIETA

Porque: pues porque los excesos del verano dejan una retencion de liquidos que ni el embalse de Palafell en Girona.
Que hacemos: Evitamos los fritos, no tomamos hidratos por la noche, no mezclamos alimentos acidos con básicos, etc siguiendo las indicaciones de una revista
Resultado: Llega un colega a tu casa a ver el partido, te tomas un par de birras y tu colega sugiere pedir una pizza. Tu primero lo dudas y luego dices: “Vale, pero yo la quiero integral, que estoy a dieta y no la voy a cagar ahora”

1) IR AL GIMNASIO

Porque: porque es el propósito universal de todo españolito medio que se precie de estar robusto, fibroso y delgado.
Que hacemos: Nos apuntamos, nos apuntamos!!!
Resultado: Al tercer día no podemos ir, al cuarto nos da pereza, y al quinto seguro que es viernes y se queda para tomar cervecillas, y además, joder , esta ahí navidades y” así empiezo desde principio de año para estar guay en verano”


Publicado en este blog el 12 de Septiembre de 2006

91 comentarios:

Mae dijo...

ja ja ja, si que es verdad que cuando termina el verano nos hacemos própositos para el año siguiente. en mi caso no es cuando termina el verano sino cuando termina Noviembre qe es mi mes de vacaciones. Sobre todo lo del fondo para vacaciones. Y lo de preparar un álbum con las fotos.. ja ja ja. Un beso.

fernando dijo...

También pasa esto cuando empieza un año nuevo.

Zar Polosco dijo...

Me quedan dos semanas para irme de vacaciones. No vengas ya a finales de julio hablando del final del verano que te corro a gorrazos.

Arual dijo...

Diez verdades como puños... jajaja!!! Muy bueno!!!
A mí me queda hoy exactamente una semanita para pillar vacas aisss que ganicas tengo ya!!!

tortlon dijo...

Oye, que por aquí hace bueno!!!

BUDOKAN dijo...

jajaja, me anoto en varios de esos aunque luego se vayan tan rápido como el verano mismo. Saludos!

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